Negative thoughts in our head such as those saying that “you are not good enough” are just like that – thoughts and nothing else. However, it can make a huge impact on oneself. These voices telling that you are not good enough can dictate you to stop thinking whatever you want to do just because it tells you such. These voices might even go as far to tell you that you don’t deserve the good things or that you are not worthy of love in this world.
Let me remind you that, again, these voices are just voices. There are good practices that you can do to shut them up.
Train Yourself To Listen To The Truth Instead
Stop believing that your thoughts are always right.
We all have a constant stream of thoughts in our minds. Sometimes, these thoughts are helpful, but often they are more like the ravings of a sleep-deprived, hyperactive person.
Even the smartest person can have thoughts that are completely irrational. It’s important to remember that these thoughts are not necessarily the truth. They are simply a story that your mind is telling based on your past experiences, personality, and other factors like the time of day, your blood sugar levels, or even the alignment of the stars.
It’s also important to note that our brains have a natural tendency to focus on the negative over the positive.
Hence, it’s also important to recognize destructive thoughts from constructive ones. The voices telling you that you are not good enough can be silenced by thoughts and facts pointing that you deserve all the good things. You may receive constructive criticisms but these are meant for your personal growth, not to destroy your image of yourself. If you can train your brain to dig up the facts and truth about you which can counter the voices telling you that you are not good enough, the sooner these negative thoughts will let you go.
So, the next time you start to have negative thoughts about yourself, remind yourself that you are not hearing the ultimate truth. You’re simply having thoughts, nothing more or less.
If These “Not Good Enough” Whispers Happened To A Friend, What Would You Advise?
One of the most efficient methods to overcome feelings of insecurity is to put yourself in someone else’s position and consider how you would respond if they were talking about themselves in the same negative manner as you do about yourself. When your best friend is feeling low and lacks self-confidence, do you tell her to be ashamed and criticize her appearance? or do you offer words of encouragement and remind her of all the amazing qualities she possesses such as her intelligence, charming personality, and infectious smile?
Talk to yourself as if it was your best friend who’s hearing the same “You are not good enough” voices. If we care a lot about other people’s emotions and would do everything just to make them feel better, why not do the same if it’s yourself who is currently in the same position? We are usually all by ourselves when we hear those not good enough voices so it all depends on us how to fight it.
It’s important to recognize that our thoughts have a profound impact on our emotions and can actually shape the way our brain functions. If you talk to yourself in a positive and supportive manner, your brain will respond with positive emotions and a sense of self-assurance.
So the next time you find yourself caught in a negative thought pattern, treat yourself as you would treat a dear friend. Start by telling yourself that “it’s okay to experience such”, that “you will do better next time” and continue to offer yourself words of encouragement and positivity. This technique will help to rewire your brain and shift your perspective towards self-acceptance and confidence.
Give It A Name And ‘Play’ With It
In an article from Bustle, Dr Maria Sirois, PsyB said that she named her negative voice Fred and told her (Fred) that she could only ride in the back seat of the car. Dr. Sirois further stated that self-criticism, worry, fear are all part of one’s mindset but they should not be the ones to dictate our direction.
In the same article, psychologist Dr. Jennifer Sweeton also states that singing to these negative voices, no matter how silly it may look, and making it as a habit would tend to remove the emotional impact that comes with “not good enough” thoughts.
Be On The Neutral Side
You cannot control what comes into your mind. They simply appear and disappear on their own.
One moment, you may be ruminating over past mistakes, and the next moment, a completely unrelated thought. This is the reason why we have random 2am thoughts and unrelated internet searches when we are bored. The mind is full of surprises. You might be watching cute kittens then the next, reading about how lightning is formed in the sky. It’s fascinating, isn’t it?
The fact is, your mind is constantly projecting a flow of thoughts and emotions, and there’s not much you can do to change it. However, many people tend to cling to negative thoughts or try to avoid them altogether. This is not the best approach to acknowledge those thoughts.
A better approach is to adopt a neutral stance, which means acknowledging your thoughts without getting too attached to them. This mindful approach will help you manage negative emotions in a healthier way.
Whenever you notice negative thoughts creeping in, try to observe them without labeling them as “good” or “bad.” Just observe them with a curious mind.
You may be feeling down right now, but your thoughts won’t stay with you forever. Before you know it, your mind will have moved on to something else.
Disconnect From Social Media
The tendency to compare oneself with others is a formidable source of human suffering. It is easy to get caught up in the comparison trap, especially in the era of social media, where it has become effortless to follow other people’s lives. This constant comparison has negative impacts on our mental health, leading to feelings of insecurity, depression, and a sense of inadequacy.
It is important to understand that comparing oneself to others is a fruitless exercise. Our lives are unique and we all have different journeys. Social media can present a misleading image of perfection and can make us feel inadequate in comparison. However, it is important to remember that what we see on social media is not real, it is a curated and often manipulated representation of someone’s life.
To combat the negative effects of comparison, it is advisable to reduce the time spent on social media and focus on one’s own life, dreams, and personal growth. Embrace your uniqueness, as no one else on this planet is like you. Recognize that you have your own set of strengths, weaknesses, and experiences that make you who you are.
Final Thoughts
Training yourself to create positive affirmations, acting as your own best friend, and removing the thoughts’ emotional impact are the best ways to shut these “not good enough” voices in our head. If you keep on dwelling on these thoughts, the voices would become louder and can interrupt more with your day-to-day tasks. Practicing self-care (starting with disconnecting from social media) and getting help are the best barriers from the impactful effects of the negative voices lurking inside our minds.
